"CRYPTOCURRENCY FOUND TO BE MORE STABLE THAN TWITTER MANAGEMENT, INVESTORS RUSH TO BUY DIGITAL COINS AS SAFER BET"
February 24, 2025
In a shocking revelation, the cryptocurrency world has managed to outpace the average lifespan of a Twitter CEO, which has led investors to reassess their portfolios. Following the recent appointment of Twitter’s 17th CEO in five years, cryptocurrency, once likened to 'the wild west', now seems as steady as government bonds.
Crypto enthusiasts are thrilled, citing that you can now bet on Bitcoin's stability over guessing who heads Twitter next. Meanwhile, financial advisors are updating their risk assessment models, suggesting a 10% ‘meme management’ buffer in all tech investments.
In related news, the SEC has proposed a new rule requiring future Twitter CEOs to disclose their astrological signs to better predict tenure longevity.
In a shocking revelation, the cryptocurrency world has managed to outpace the average lifespan of a Twitter CEO, which has led investors to reassess their portfolios. Following the recent appointment of Twitter’s 17th CEO in five years, cryptocurrency, once likened to 'the wild west', now seems as steady as government bonds.
Crypto enthusiasts are thrilled, citing that you can now bet on Bitcoin's stability over guessing who heads Twitter next. Meanwhile, financial advisors are updating their risk assessment models, suggesting a 10% ‘meme management’ buffer in all tech investments.
In related news, the SEC has proposed a new rule requiring future Twitter CEOs to disclose their astrological signs to better predict tenure longevity.