"BITCOIN DECLARES ITSELF 'TIRED OF DRAMA,' ANNOUNCES VACATION TO BERMUDA TRIANGLE"
February 2, 2025 - In an unprecedented move, the cryptocurrency market experienced a surge in stability today after multiple cryptocurrencies reportedly agreed to resolve their differences. The consensus was reached during a secretive summit held on the dark web, rumored to have been moderated by an AI resembling Satoshi Nakamoto.
The gathering was prompted by the recent fatigue investors expressed over the incessant rollercoaster of drama and volatility. “We're just as tired as our investors,” a spokesperson for Ethereum confessed. “Plus, after seeing Bitcoin book a vacation, we figured it's time we all took a chill pill.”
In response, stock markets worldwide have shown mixed feelings. The NASDAQ commented wryly, “We thought cryptocurrencies enjoyed the drama.
The gathering was prompted by the recent fatigue investors expressed over the incessant rollercoaster of drama and volatility. “We're just as tired as our investors,” a spokesperson for Ethereum confessed. “Plus, after seeing Bitcoin book a vacation, we figured it's time we all took a chill pill.”
In response, stock markets worldwide have shown mixed feelings. The NASDAQ commented wryly, “We thought cryptocurrencies enjoyed the drama.