"CRYPTO PUNDITS PREDICT MARKET RECOVERY AS SOON AS EVERYONE AGREES WHAT MONEY IS ANYWAY"
February 9, 2025 - In an unprecedented twist of fate, the world's top cryptocurrency analysts have convened on a new strategy to counter the ongoing market volatility: mass hypnosis. "If everyone just believes hard enough, Bitcoin can hit $100,000," stated CryptoVisionary CEO, Max Ledger. This comes after the 2024 revelation that 78% of crypto traders were actually bots, leading to a global existential crisis about human participation in digital finance.
The meeting, held on a virtual yacht in the Metaverse, also proposed the establishment of 'Belief Boosters'—weekly sessions where traders are encouraged to visualize their digital wallets overflowing with virtual coins.
The meeting, held on a virtual yacht in the Metaverse, also proposed the establishment of 'Belief Boosters'—weekly sessions where traders are encouraged to visualize their digital wallets overflowing with virtual coins.