"CRYPTOCURRENCY FOUND TO BE LEADING CAUSE OF SPONTANEOUS YACHT PURCHASES AMONGST TECH BROs"
February 12, 2025 - In an unprecedented turn of events, the cryptocurrency community was rocked by the emergence of "GulliCoin," a token launched by a consortium of seabirds. Yes, you heard right—seabirds. Scientists equipped with too much funding and a quirky sense of humor genetically modified these birds to mine cryptocurrency by squawking.
The project began as a lighthearted exploration into animal behavior but took a financial twist after a particularly savvy pelican named Pete decoded the blockchain. Now, with seagulls and pelicans hoarding digital wallets, traditional miners are crying fowl.
Regulators are scrambling. The SEC has tentatively proposed the ‘Avian Asset Act’, aiming to claw back some control, but legal experts argue that it’s a wild goose chase.
The project began as a lighthearted exploration into animal behavior but took a financial twist after a particularly savvy pelican named Pete decoded the blockchain. Now, with seagulls and pelicans hoarding digital wallets, traditional miners are crying fowl.
Regulators are scrambling. The SEC has tentatively proposed the ‘Avian Asset Act’, aiming to claw back some control, but legal experts argue that it’s a wild goose chase.