"MILLIONAIRE DOG CLAIMS TO HAVE INVENTED BITCOIN, SUES FOR BONE PAYMENTS"
January 30, 2025 - In an unexpected twist of fate, cryptocurrency enthusiasts woke up today to the news that Satoshi Nakamoto's true identity has been claimed by none other than a millionaire canine, Sparky Bitbone. The affluent Alsatian alleges that he masterminded Bitcoin from his high-tech kennel back in 2008, and is now demanding royalties in the form of gourmet bones. Legal experts are puzzled over how to handle the case, as current laws don’t cover patent claims by pets. Meanwhile, the crypto community has taken to Twitter, with #BarkingForBitcoin trending worldwide. Whether this turns out to be a shaggy dog story or a landmark case in animal rights, it’s certainly given investors paws for thought.