"CRYPTOCURRENCY FOUND TO BE LEADING CAUSE OF INVESTOR INSOMNIA, STUDY SPONSORED BY COFFEE CHAINS SHOWS"
March 20, 2025 – In an unprecedented move today, the cryptocurrency world has witnessed the birth of the first-ever Emotional Support Coin (ESC). As market volatility hits new peaks, the creators of ESC promise it will provide emotional stability to its holders, unlike its more fluctuating counterparts.
The launch event, held virtually from an undisclosed bunker, featured the coin’s developers wearing blockchain-themed pajamas, symbolizing comfort and security. Lead developer, Satoshi Nakamood, stated, "With ESC, your feelings finally have a safe space in the blockchain."
Regulators, however, seem less amused.
The launch event, held virtually from an undisclosed bunker, featured the coin’s developers wearing blockchain-themed pajamas, symbolizing comfort and security. Lead developer, Satoshi Nakamood, stated, "With ESC, your feelings finally have a safe space in the blockchain."
Regulators, however, seem less amused.