CRYPTOCOIN CALLED 'BUBBLE' BURSTS; INVESTORS SHOCKED TO FIND IT WAS ACTUAL BUBBLE
"BITCOIN BUYS BURGER KING: FAST FOOD GIANT TO ACCEPT CRYPTO AFTER FLURRY OF REGULATORY FLIP\-FLOPS"
"CRYPTOCURRENCIES DECLARE INDEPENDENCE FROM REALITY: MARKET PRICES NOW DETERMINED BY ASTROLOGICAL SIGNS"
"CRYPTOCURRENCY FOUND TO BE LEADING CAUSE OF INVESTOR INSOMNIA, STUDY SPONSORED BY COFFEE CHAINS SHOWS"
WORLD'S MOST ELUSIVE CRYPTOCURRENCY: WALLET PASSWORD REMAINS UNCRACKED FOR FIFTH YEAR DESPITE OWNER'S BEST EFFORTS
"CRYPTO COMMUNITY BLAMES REGULATION AFTER 568TH CRASH THIS YEAR, CALLS IT UNPRECEDENTED INTERFERENCE"
"CRYPTO ENTHUSIASTS REJOICE AS NEW COIN PROMISES TO ONLY CRASH ON WEEKDAYS"
CRYPTO BULLS NOW ACCEPTING TEARS AS NEWEST FORM OF CURRENCY AMIDST MARKET CRASH
CRYPTO TYCOON LAUNCHES NEW TOKEN PROMISING TO REFUND INVESTORS WITH ANCIENT LOST TREASURES: ABOVE\-GROUND RAILROAD STOCKS SURGE
DOGECOIN FOUNDER ANNOUNCES PLAN TO REPLACE U\.S\. DOLLAR, EXPERTS PREDICT IT WILL BE AS STABLE AS TWITTER'S LEADERSHIP
CRYPTO CRUSADER CLAIMS "MARS COIN" WILL BE RED PLANET'S OFFICIAL CURRENCY, IGNORES EARTHLY REGULATIONS
